Day 28 - Love makes Sacrifices 7/27/11

Today's Dare

What is one of the greatest needs in your spouse's life right now?  Is there a need you could lift from their shoulders today by a daring act of sacrifice on your part?  Whether the need is big or small, purpose to do what you can to meet the need.

How much of your mate's stress is caused by your lack of concern or initiative?  When you expressed a desire to help, how did they receive it?  Are there other needs you could meet?

I was thinking about this already yesterday and couldnt come up with anything because I already do EVERYTHING with some to little help from Dave.  I grew up in a family where the Mother/Wife did the house cleaning, cooking, taking care of the kids...etc etc..the whole '50's routine.  Which is fine and dandy with me.  BUT I would full time and Im 8 months pregnant. I CANT physically do it ALL all alone.  So any help I get..I appreciate.  Anyway, back to the dare.  I feel I have been trying to take the stress of the money and bills off of Dave by balancing the checkbook when I can and going through medical debt, etc etc.  I can't pay any of the bills because I he pays everything online and I dont have passwords to anything and I have asked him multiple times for them...but he still has yet to give them to me.  I dont think he is hiding anything from me..I just think he doesnt think it as important as I do.  I mean, if something happens to him, I have no way of paying anything. I dont know account numbers, when stuff is due..etc etc.  So, hopefully he will just write the passwords and information down for me to do it sometime.

I wanted to add that last night was pretty awesome..as have the past few days been pretty awesome.  We have spent more time with each other and less time with the computers or cleaning etc etc.  It been laying on the couch watching TV or eatting dinner and chatting.  So Im feeling pretty confident about this dare nowadays.

Favorite Phrase

Too often the only way we notice that life is hard for our mate is when they start complaining about it.  Then instead of genuinely caring or rushing in to help, we might think they just have a bad attitude.

This bad attitude is something Dave has told me that I HAVE on many occassions on previous fights and arguments and I have to remind him of the reasons WHY I have a bad attitude.   

The pain and pressure they're under don't register with us the way it does with it's our pain and presure. When we want to complain, we expect everyone to understand and feel sorrry for us.

Exactly...